Thursday, August 05, 2010
♥ The long windy path
HELLO. if anyone's still reading my blog. The urge to blog now, in office. No reason and no idea y blogging strike upon me after i've stopped for abt 1/2 year.
This 1/2 year was indeed a turning point in my life.Im now a part of the society.But one thing differentiates me from the routine OL life would be the various chances of traveling. Gd? Bad? I dunno till now.
I realized how fortunate i am in sg, a sheltered home, fren's company and of coz the constant love from the bf who dotes me like a princess. One only get to realized how lucky he/she is once he/she sees how different the living standard are.
Melbourne trip is FABULOUS. its too short n everything seems to happen in a dream. Great trip with the crane family members. We stayed up in a small cozy apartment and i felt for once, i have a complete family. A big brother who is our hero throughout the trip and 2 big sisterss whom i can rely on. Its juz too perfect. Too perfect to be true. Too perfect for a girl like me to experience. I know. It sounds pathetic and no esteem at all. Thats all in the past and i had already walk out from the shadows. But at times like now, i couldnt help to feel a lil lonely, a lil emo and i juz hope all of these isnt happening at all.
Im getting all so whiny, so dependence and watever it is, i hate to be myself for now. I felt the only way to stop it is to stay alone, stay a distance from the rest, from everyone else. juz me alone.
Maybe i juz dunno who am i, what kind of person i am already. HAA and once again, I felt like a kid once again who seeks ATTENTION BADLY.
I SERIOUSLY HATE THE FEELING OF BEING SO LOVED, SO DOTED, SO CARED, and ultimately im being left alone, from the rest, from the boy, from my family. wouldnt it be better that i felt nothing from the start?
Maybe thats how others felt too. I dunno how the rest handle it but for sure, im taking a negative stand on this issue. I need time alone. to recharge. to start thinking about things i should and push unnecessary tots away.
I juz want to be the independent me again. to let go of everything. No feelings No commitments No worries.
If ever, anyone came across and read this randomly. let me know, at least i know if my blog is still visited by anyone.
sigh. i realli dun wanna be affected by it. dun wanna think so much abt it. FML.
FML.
FML.
This 1/2 year was indeed a turning point in my life.Im now a part of the society.But one thing differentiates me from the routine OL life would be the various chances of traveling. Gd? Bad? I dunno till now.
I realized how fortunate i am in sg, a sheltered home, fren's company and of coz the constant love from the bf who dotes me like a princess. One only get to realized how lucky he/she is once he/she sees how different the living standard are.
Melbourne trip is FABULOUS. its too short n everything seems to happen in a dream. Great trip with the crane family members. We stayed up in a small cozy apartment and i felt for once, i have a complete family. A big brother who is our hero throughout the trip and 2 big sisterss whom i can rely on. Its juz too perfect. Too perfect to be true. Too perfect for a girl like me to experience. I know. It sounds pathetic and no esteem at all. Thats all in the past and i had already walk out from the shadows. But at times like now, i couldnt help to feel a lil lonely, a lil emo and i juz hope all of these isnt happening at all.
Im getting all so whiny, so dependence and watever it is, i hate to be myself for now. I felt the only way to stop it is to stay alone, stay a distance from the rest, from everyone else. juz me alone.
Maybe i juz dunno who am i, what kind of person i am already. HAA and once again, I felt like a kid once again who seeks ATTENTION BADLY.
I SERIOUSLY HATE THE FEELING OF BEING SO LOVED, SO DOTED, SO CARED, and ultimately im being left alone, from the rest, from the boy, from my family. wouldnt it be better that i felt nothing from the start?
Maybe thats how others felt too. I dunno how the rest handle it but for sure, im taking a negative stand on this issue. I need time alone. to recharge. to start thinking about things i should and push unnecessary tots away.
I juz want to be the independent me again. to let go of everything. No feelings No commitments No worries.
If ever, anyone came across and read this randomly. let me know, at least i know if my blog is still visited by anyone.
sigh. i realli dun wanna be affected by it. dun wanna think so much abt it. FML.
FML.
FML.
♥ And did I tell you that Im falling deeper each time..
2:34 PM
0 commented
2:34 PM
0 commented
